Lost Past
by 0811DarkAngel
Summary: Quinn is still hurting from what Rachel put her through. After two years have passed they reunite, Quinns feelings never changed, will Rachel ever fall in love with her again? Sorry I suck at summaries. Mostly Faberry with some small Pezberry, Britana and Klaine. No Beth. M for later chapters. Read and Review!
1. Chapter 1

**AN: ****Hey all. Sorry about being away for so long. I've been really busy lately so I haven't exactly had the time to update RMD or CGYOOMH. I will go back to these stories but when I have time to write out all the ideas I have for them.****So oddly enough this story was inspired by listening to Snuff by Slipknot. This will be another of my many multi-chapter fanfics. This is just the beginning of it, this is the setting as of right now, the smut will come later! (no pun intended)****Disclaimer: Sadly****_I do not own glee or any of its characters_****. If I did I would rename it Faberry Forever.. Yea... hahah :)****This story starts out with broken-up faberry about 2 years after, They've barely started speaking to each other again. No!Beth.****Anything in bold italics are Quinns thoughts.********Please Read and Review. Enjoy!**

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Quinn stared out at the dance floor, looking at her friends enjoy their first of the rest of their lives. Across the dance floor there was a very distinct laugh that she could hear above all the music. She felt her heart drop to her stomach as she dared to glance over to confirm where that all-too-familiar laugh came from.

There, sitting across the dance floor was none other than her ex-girlfriend, the one who she thought would be the one, Rachel Berry. Quinn's smile faltered as she took in the view before her. Rachel looked completely beautiful in her red dress, she looked completely radiant. But next to her was the woman that had taken her spot in Rachel's life. Quinn narrowed her eyes at the woman who took her the tears could form in her eyes once again, she tore her eyes away from the couple and looked back at the newly wed couple. Kurt and Blaine deserved to be happy, but the blonde couldn't help but feel somewhat jealous of the two men dancing to the music.

Quinn turned her body back to face her table, with her back to her ex she felt a little safer. _**'****Out of sight, out of mind...'** _The couples first dance came to an end, the crowd cheered the couple as they stepped off the dance floor. The music picked up and the rest of the crowd got up to start dancing.

Quinn chanced a look and instantly regretted it. She saw the person who used to be the object of her affection currently pressed against the person who she hated with everything in her body. Quinn clenched her jaw, but relaxed when a hand touched her shoulder. "Q, please relax... I know it's not easy. I'm not thrilled to see them like that either but.. We should at least still be happy for them" Quinn turned to look into the bright blue eyes that spoke to her. Brittany gave her a soft smile before her eyes returned to the dance floor. Quinns gazed followed as they looked at their ex's dancing in each others arms. "Britt-Britt... it still hurts. She doesn't belong in her arms. She belongs in mine..." Quinn said sadly turning back to the table. Brittany looked at her friend who was still clearly hurt after what the tiny brunette had done to looked out to the beach and watched the moonlight shimmering across the water. The hazel eyed blonde could feel her eyes begin to well with tears. "Quinn. You know I understand what you are going through. We were both thrown into this same boat. But you need to move on. Rachel and Santana clearly have, and I have Marley. Q you can't keep doing this to yourself. You need to be with someone else." Brittany stated quietly as she continued to look at the couple on the dance floor. Quinn was tired of hearing those words.

She was tired of hearing the words 'Move on', 'Get over it', 'Find someone new'. No one really understood what it felt like to have their heart torn out by the very person who swore they would do whatever it takes to protect it. "Britt... Please don't start.. Not today. Not now." Brittany nodded, knowing that if she pushed the subject that the blonde would shut her out again.

As the night progressed, the dance floor remained full. The hazel-eyed woman stayed seated at her table while Brittany and her girlfriend went out on the dance floor. Quinn stayed deep in her thoughts, replaying the past in her mind. She looked up at the night sky, looking at it as if the answers to all her questions lay within the stars. In that instant she could feel every emotion that she ever experienced when she thought of Rachel.

Quinn was so wrapped up into her own thoughts she didn't hear the voice from behind her call her name. She jumped slightly when she felt a small hand gently grasp her shoulder. The hazel eyed woman didn't need to turn around in order to know who it was, she could tell by familiar scent that invaded her every sense. Quinn slowly stood up and turned around. Brown doe eyes met the piercing Hazel gaze. In that instant, the anger left Quinn's body as she stared into those all too familiar eyes."Rachel..." Quinn said quietly. The brunette smiled softly, "Hello Quinn, how are you?". Rachel had approached her on her own. "I'm fine I guess. How about you?" "I'm perfectly fine, thank you for asking."

The blonde took note of the song that played as they stood in front of each other.** '_Out of all the songs in the world... Its now or never, what's the worst that can happen?' _**Quinn took a deep breath and stuck her hand out, "Rachel, would you like to dance with me?" Quinn stood silently, nervous and waiting for an answer. After what felt like an eternity, Rachel smiled softly and placed her hand in Quinn's. As the ex-couple made their way to the dance floor, they both listened to the lyrics that they both used to cherish.

_Just a kiss on your lips in the moonlight_

_Just a touch of the fire burning so bright_

_I don't want to mess this thing up _

_I don't want to push too far_

_Just a shot in the dark that you just might_

_be the one I've been waiting for my whole life_

_So baby I'm alright with just a kiss goodnight_

The two started to dance in time with the music, looking at each other as the song continued to play. "I've missed you" The brunette said quietly. Quinn felt her heart ache a little after hearing that confession. "I've missed you too Rachel. You look amazing.." Rachel blushed lightly. "So do you..." They both stayed in silence for a little, allowing themselves to be lost in the music. "Quinn?" "Yes little star?" Quinn closed her eyes after allowing the nickname slip, mentally slapping herself. Rachel caught it but didn't acknowledge it."How did we end up here? I mean, how did we end up like this?"

Quinn opened her eyes and looked at the tiny brunette in front of her."It just happened. We just fell apart..." Quinn said quietly. "...I'm sorry about what happened.." Rachel said in a small voice, but Quinn heard it. "Rachel please..." "No. I'm sorry. Honestly and truly sorry about what I did to you." "Rachel please drop this." "Quinn... Please hear me out."

Quinn felt her eyes begin to swell with unshed tears as a lump formed in her throat. She didn't want to hear this. Not now. Not at their friends wedding. Not while they danced to their song.

"Quinn. I wish you'd understand how sorry I am and how horrible I feel about what happened." Quinn looked at the woman in front of her and stopped completely. Hearing those words triggered something inside her. "Sorry? _Sorry? _Is that what you think is going to make this all better? You left me. You crushed me, and left me not caring about what you did and now you're coming back and saying you're sorry?" "Quinn please..." "No! God Rachel do you have any clue what you fucking did to me? You fucking left me for her. That ungrateful selfish back-stabbing bitch. And all you can think to say is you're sorry?" Rachel stayed in silence.

Through gritted teeth Quinn spoke lowly, "Go back to your perfect little life with that bitch. Go back to the life that I obviously couldn't give you." Quinn disconnected herself from her ex and ran out quickly to the beach. Quinn heard Rachel calling her name and what sounded like footsteps running after her. As much as she wanted to walk back and apologize, she continued to her unknown destination. Quinn ran as fast as she could, with the last of the song and Rachel's voice slowly fading into the distance.

_Let's do this right with just a kiss goodnight_

_With a kiss goodnight_

_A kiss goodnight_

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_**So let me know what you think!**_

_**Song: Just a kiss by Lady Antebellum**_


	2. Chapter 2

**AN: So I decided to give you guys another chapter because I really felt like I needed to write this. I will reveal what happened between Rachel and Quinn later on in the story. Sorry about the short chapter, I wrote this before I had to go to class. And excuse the errors, I'm going to have someone proofread all my work when she gets the chance.**

Disclaimer: I do not own glee or any of its Characters.

Please read and Review!

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Quinn's legs had finally stopped moving, by the time she looked around she was far from the wedding reception. She looked up at the bright pale moon and couldn't hold it in any longer. She fell to her knees and broke down, it was all too much. Seeing Rachel, dancing with her to what once was their song, it was overwhelming. The Hazel-eyed woman continued to cry, not hearing the muffled sound of footprints approaching her.

Rachel finally caught up to Quinn, kneeling down immediately to place a comforting hand on the blonde's back. "Don't... J-just do-on't.." Quinn said between broken sobs.  
Rachel's heart broke at the sight before her. Seeing Quinn like this hurt her in ways she thought wouldn't affect her anymore. When Quinn pulled be body away from the brunette womans touch she cried harder. Rachel sat there on her knees in the sand as the strongest person she knew sobbed into the sand because of her.

"Quinn..."

Quinn pulled herself together enough to form coherent sentences. The blonde woman stayed in her position as she calmed herself down before speaking, she couldn't look at the brunette. Quinn knew if she looked at Rachel she would break down all over again, and that was something she didn't want to do again; at least not in front of the one who caused it.

"Rachel don't you get it?... You broke me..."

The tone in Quinn's voice sent a pang of guilt and fear into Rachel. She sounded so broken and vulnerable, but her voice still sounded cold and distant. The world around the two of them felt like it came to a halt. The air that surrounded the women felt heavy, the tension was beginning to feel unbearable.

Rachel shifted uncomfortably at the words that left Quinn's mouth. She couldn't find the right words to say. "I'm sorry..." "Is that all you can really say to me Rachel? Sorry won't erase the way I've felt for the past two years. 'I'm sorry' won't fix two long years of the emotional pain you've put me through," the tiny brunette stayed in silence, unable to really say anything "I cried every night for months, You closed me out, you basically dropped me from your life as if I were a deadly poison... Do you know what it feels like to have your entire world ripped away from you in a matter of minutes?"

Quinn stood up from her place and turned to look down at the brunette woman who remained on her knees, with her eyes glued to the sand. "Do you know what it feels like to have your heart ripped out? To have the reason behind your smile become the reason behind your broken-hearted tears? Of course you don't because you walked away from me without a second thought."

Rachel stood from her spot but kept her eyes to the floor. She couldn't respond to anything Quinn said. Quinn turned to face the water to keep herself from looking at the one person she wanted to comfort her. "After the dust settled I hated myself. I hated myself because I couldn't find the strength to hate you. I couldn't hate you because I care for you too much..." Rachel's eyes snapped up and looked at the blonde who looked at the stars again. Rachel took a step forward to approach her ex, but stopped herself.

"I tried to contact you for months, but you ignored me. Whenever you saw me you turned your back to me. You acted as if I became a part of your past that you were too ashamed to admit..." The blondes voice was quiet and shaky.

Rachel found the courage to walk to Quinn and stand in front of her. When hazel eyes met deep brown, Rachel gasped. That was the first time she really looked into Quinn's eyes since everything had happened. Rachel was so used to seeing bright hazel eyes that were full of love, life and cheer. But that wasn't what she saw. Quinn's eyes turned into dull hazel eyes, empty, and lost. Rachel felt her heart drop, she did this to her.

Without thinking Rachel pulled Quinn into a hug, as if she tried to right all of her wrongs. Quinn stiffened when the brunette wrapped her arms around her. Quinn fought her body, she desperately wanted to wrap her arms around the woman who was currently pressed against her. But Quinn's mind won. The blonde woman gently pushed herself away from her ex-girlfriends embrace. She didn't want to look into her eyes but she did. Rachel looked hurt that Quinn pulled away, but Quinn kept her ground.

"Quinn... We need to talk about this..." Rachel tried to grasp the woman's arm but the woman quickly stepped back to prevent it. "I know that what I did is unforgivable... But we need to talk about this."

"Rachel, I think it's too late for that." Quinn said sadly while shaking her head. "Quinn please... I can't lose your friendship..." Rachel's eyes quickly filled with tears, she didn't want her to leave her life looked into the brunettes brown eyes, she knew she would regret her next words but she couldn't stop herself.

"You should have thought about that before you left me for Santana."

With those words Quinn turned and walked away from Rachel. A sob broke the silence as she walked away from the beach and to her car. She couldn't look back.** "What's done is done. There is no turning back for us."**


	3. Chapter 3

**AN: I'm sorry for being MIA for the past few months. Life has been crazy but its slowing down. All my other stories will be updated soon I promise. Heres a quick chapter for those of you who have stuck with it. Once again I am so sorry for being away for so long.**

**Once again please excuse my errors.**

**Disclaimer: I do not own glee or any of its Characters.**

**Please read and Review!**

_XxX_

_Previously- With those words Quinn turned and walked away from Rachel. A sob broke the silence as she walked away from the beach and to her car. She couldn't look back. "What's done is done. There is no turning back for us."_

_XxX_

It had been two months since that night on the beach. Quinn's word seemed to echo in a constant loop in the back of Rachel's mind. _"You should have thought about that before you left me for Santana"_ Rachel sat quietly in the living room of her apartment staring blankly at the tv as she ignored the rustling in the background. In the corner of her eye Rachel saw the familiar black suit scurry to the end table next to the door, she felt the swift kiss that was placed on her cheek.

"Mi amor I'll see you tonight once I get home" Rachel nodded her head in acknowledgement and with that Santana walked out of the door. Rachel stared at the tv for a few seconds longer before turning it off. She aimlessly walked to the bedroom and hit play on her ipod. She wanted to get lost in the music as she stretched. Rachel allowed her mind to get lost in the familiar sounds of The Script, Dave Matthews Band, and Jason Mraz. She felt at peace as the lyrics danced through her mind.

The fifth song, however, was not as kind as the songs before it. Rachel felt her body immediately tense when the sound of the acoustic guitar filled the room. Rachels mind immediately flew back to first time she heard this song.

_*Flashback*_

_Rachel sat quietly on the blanket as she stared at Quinn with bright eyes. The night had been lovely. It was no secret that the two had deeply fallen for each other while dating over the last five months. Quinn looked nervous as she tore her gaze from Rachels to look at the night sky. They sat alone in the park, the faint sound of crickets was the only thing that broke the comfortable silence that surrounded the two. Rachel gently grasped Quinns forearm to gain the blondes attention before softly speaking, "Hey you, is everything alright?"_

_Quinn smiled warmly as she looked into Rachel's eyes. She had been looking for the courage to do this. She practiced for three months, working to make it perfect for the beautiful girl sitting right in front of her._

_She stood up, "I'm perfectly fine, but I need you to do something for me Rach." Rachel stared at the girl, "Of course, anything Quinn". The blonde girl took a deep breath before speaking once again, "Well, there is one more thing that I want to do tonight before this date ends. I want you to just please wait until I finish what I have planned before you speak or even react to what I'm going to do. Can you please do that for me?" The brunette looked at the girl before slowly nodding, not sure to what she was agreeing to._

_Quinn walked to the large tree a few yards away and returned with an acoustic guitar. Rachel smiled widely, realizing just how much Quinn had prepared for this date. She had trouble containing her excitement. Quinn sat in front of Rachel, the acoustic guitar resting in her lap. She took one last deep breath, looked into the brunette's eyes and began gently playing. Looking to see Rachel's reaction, she then began to sing._

_"Waiting for your call, I'm sick, call I'm angry_

_call I'm desperate for your voice_

_Listening to the song we used to sing_

_In the car, do you remember_

_Butterfly, Early Summer_

_It's playing on repeat, Just like when we would meet_

_Like when we would meet_

_I was born to tell you I love you_

_and I am torn to do what I have to, to make you mine_

_Stay with me tonight_

_Stripped and polished, I am new, I am fresh_

_I am feeling so ambitious, you and me, flesh to flesh_

_Cause every breath that you will take_

_when you are sitting next to me_

_will bring life into my deepest hopes, What's your fantasy?_

_(What's your, what's your, what's your...)_

_I was born to tell you I love you_

_and I am torn to do what I have to, to make you mine_

_Stay with me tonight_

_And I'm tired of being all alone, and this solitary moment makes me want to come back home_

_And I'm tired of being all alone, and this solitary moment makes me want to come back home_

_And I'm tired of being all alone, and this solitary moment makes me want to come back home_

_And I'm tired of being all alone, and this solitary moment makes me want to come back home_

_I was born to tell you I love you_

_and I am torn to do what I have to, to make you mine_

_Stay with me tonight_

_I was born to tell you I love you_

_and I am torn to do what I have to, to make you mine_

_Stay with me tonight."_

_Rachel's eyes brimmed with tears, speechless. Quinn put the guitar down, scooted a little closer and reached for the smaller girls hand before gently speaking. "Rachel... It's taken me so long to reach this moment. I wanted tonight to be perfect for you. Everyday I fall more in love with you, I've wanted to do this since the day I met you, and this urge grew stronger when I realized you feel the same way I feel about you. I'm sorry it took me this long to do this but I hope this night makes up for the wait. Rachel Barbara Berry, will you be my girlfriend?"_

_*End Flashback*_

Rachel's eyes filled with tears as the song came to an end. It physically hurt to listen to the song that used to matter so much to her. She never had the strength to get rid of this song, everything about it reminded her of that night. Rachel walked over and stopped the music before the next song started. She walked into the bathroom and looked into the mirror. She didn't see the strong 22 woman she thought she was, in the mirror staring back at her was the image of her 16 year old self with a red nose and puffy eyes. At least thats what she thought she looked like. She wiped her eyes and composed herself before walking to the living room. She grabbed her phone and sent out a quick text.

**Hey Kurt. I need a rather large favor from you. -RB**

**And what exactly might that be? -KA**

**I need you to send me Quinn's number. Please don't question why. -RB**

**Hmph. Well... As much as I would like to bombard you with a million questions I will spare you this time. I expect answers later Miss Berry. -KA**

A minute later Kurt sent the number to her. Without hesitation she selected the number and called.

_"Hey you've reached Quinn Fabray, Leave a message and I'll get back to you as soon as possible! Thanks!"_

She took a deep breath and waited for the beep.

****"Hey Quinn... It's Rachel..."


End file.
